restless nights of doing nothing at all
have caught up to me
now I'm tired
and weary
through my window I enter those
field field fields
empty field field fields
and the empty fields are full of
empty bodies of beautiful women
their empty eyes look
for fulfillment
draining the green from the grass
which is now contained in their fingernails
their fingernails shine under the empty sun
and the empty green radiates
like a field of jade
their smooth skin is now
the smooth smooth field
and I lay on it
weary, from the world
when I wake up I see
I just fell asleep on you,
my dear
and the emptiness
all
this
time
was just me
and you...
...dressed in pearly white
empty/white
like a blank canvas
or a pair of pearls
like your eyes
empty like a well with no water
empty like a coin
-or a word that shines in my hand
and I drop it into the deep
and the emptiness dissapears
as the splash at the bottom
echoes out your name
empty like
the life of day-to-day
empty like the emptiness
that makes our bones sturdy (or break)
our skin feel
and our souls burning
empty like most of the words
that get through my head
in a day
empty like looking outside
and seeing the far far far away
and then,
I feel
fulfillment
as you bury your nails deep into my hearth
and it spurs out five rivers
which enclose between them the world
as the hearth runs dry
and I become one with the soil
at 6 crossing points of the 5 rivers
6 times I was reborn
the first one danced with you all night
and kept you warm
till the morning
and at the bring of the sunlight he fled
before you would dot the same thing
the second one listened
as you cut your lip
with your sharp words
and he gently ran through them with his finger
and gave them a healing kiss
the third watched from the shadows
still dripping from the river red
with red in his eyes
and the souls of many men
dried, on his hands
the fourth said a lot
paired words and sounds as he could
he wanted to be a wizard
He was the mightiest,
when he felt the weakest.
He is now dying
with lightning lightning out
from each of his fingers
The fifth ran
and swore to never look back
but he looked everytime he tought
no one was looking at him
he hid his care
in carelessness
he ran as fast as he could
so he can come back from the other side
as soon as he could
the sixth had it all figured out
he was empty
collecting toughts
he found the five
he slit their throats
drank their blood
stole their goals
the sixth man
on the sixth day
became a man
but only after he died
six times before
666
666
I repeat
just so you know
what you always knew
but maybe never had the courage
to reassure yourself
and It's the fact
that the most beautiful toughts
are always beside the darkest
they mention hearths
as a symbol of love
in that sense
how much more love do you see
when I kill 6 men
and drink their blood
use six hearths as six cups
wicked
twisted
true
honest
I paint with only white
so the flaws are more visible
all the bruises
scars
all the dirt
the darkness hides you.
It hid me
so I had time to collect myself
but when you do
it's time to present
all that you collected
all that you built
under the light
on a canvas
of pure white
and it's not dirt
don't be scared
that you made that holy white canvas dirty
just because it's white...
all that means
its that It's empty
you give it the meaning
the killing
the blood
the disformed monsters
with slithering tongues
we all cast shadows
thats how you know, you're there
if you just go towards the sun
you will burn
so I
the Sixth
found all the others
and did to them
unthinkable things
now they are
flesh of my flesh
and blood of my blood
so that I could realise
the point
to my emptiness
but in the meantime of course
as I ate them up
I also drank up their nightmares
in which I often find myself drowning
often I try to,
clear my mind
I just close my eyes
and rest my limbs
and yet
I find myself screaming
as loud as I can
between the six walls of my soul
and that's an awful thing right?
feels like being trapped in a hexagram of
my homegrown near madness
is it?
or is it awful just because it's not
pure white
is it awful just because it has
long black claws
instead of nicely cut fingernails?
is it awful because
it has sharp black teeth
which bit of a chunk
from the neck of the universe?
instead of a
lying and ever-pleasing tongue of a coward?
It's not dressed in white
like the man with a suitcase
who came to sell you yourself
It's just a man
dying under the hands of a witch
and came back
just so he could again
5 times kill himself
he's the sixth
and right now
he has his madness once again
in his hands
the only things that is missing
from his fulfillment
is emptiness
and as he buried
his past
five times
there's one more
person left
it's the witch
who started it all
by digging her nails
through his chest
he counsels the bones
from his dead selves
and they tell him
where to find her
and he goes
with a goal set
and the reds still on his hands
he finds her
laying on her bed
in the hours of early morning
tired, asleep
from the days tests
and he lays next to her
finding his emptiness
and putting his eyes
soul
body
and all his six dead selves
to rest
drawing white letters
gently
on her chest
